So it’s over… but he keeps on calling. Despite breaking up with you, your ex boyfriend is still blowing up your phone and leaving you a whole bunch of text-messages. The mixed signals continue, and you’re left wondering exactly what it is he wants… if he really wants anything at all.

Friendship? Companionship? Does he want to get back together? It’s never easy to know what’s going on in your exboyfriend’s head, especially after your relationship is over.

In the end, there’s good news and bad news about your ex keeping in touch. If you want your boyfriend back and are looking for signs that he still loves you, this type of continued contact can be very good. It generally means your ex is not yet ready to let go, which translates to him wanting to keep you around. Yet at the same time, playing phone or text-tag with your ex after he breaks up with you is also a bad move, because it enables him to keep the breakup going long after he might have wanted to get back together again.

There are a wide variety of reasons your ex will still call you. And no matter what he says (or how innocent the contact might seem), there’s always a meaning behind each and every one of these types of post-breakup contact.

Your ex boyfriend Wants To Keep You In His Life

In this case, your ex will keep in touch almost as if you never broke up at all. Most of your conversations will be small talk, but if you examine them more closely you’ll see that your exboyfriend is often prying into your newly-single social life. Why? Because he still has feelings for you, and might still (one day) want to get back together. He’s keeping in touch to make sure you don’t find somebody else, while he goes out to see if the grass really is greener on the other side of the fence.

Your Ex Keeps Calling or Texting To Lead You On

Sometimes, post-breakup contact will be laden with ‘maybes’ and ‘somedays’. If your ex boyfriend is wishy-washy about getting back together, or promises that maybe one day you can be a couple again, it’s because he wants to keep the door open to your past relationship. It’s nice for him to know that if his new single life doesn’t quite work out, he can always get you back. These lead-on phone calls or text messages will be both hot and cold: your ex will flirt with you one minute and then ask for space the next, stringing you along in the process.

The Guilt-Trip Phone Call

If your ex boyfriend is heaping tons of guilt on you or blaming you for the breakup, it’s because he never really wanted it (or is regretting it now that it happened). This is a big sign that your ex wants you back, but he’s trying to do it on his terms. In getting back together, he wants you to feel as if he’s doing you a favor: this gives him a giant portion of the control over your new relationship, should you decide to date each other again.

Never, ever let your ex make you feel guilty about the breakup. Reversing your breakup should be a 50/50 process, with both of you eagerly (and not reluctantly) wanting to give things another shot.

Your Ex Boyfriend Keeps Trying To Hook Up With You

Breakups don’t always go the way people want them to, and after asking for space your boyfriend might suddenly find himself pretty lonely. If he knows you still want him back, your ex might take advantage of this fact by trying to hook up or sleep with you, even though you’re no longer dating.

Before falling into the trap of breakup sex, make sure you know what you’re doing. An ex might say or do anything to get you back into bed with him, but by the next morning he might be cold, distant, and gone again. You don’t want to get hurt, and you also don’t want to provide your ex with free access to fulfilling his sexual needs whenever he wants to. Make sure he knows that if he wants you, he needs to take all of you… or he gets none of you at all.

Ways You Can Get Your Ex Boyfriend To Call or Contact You

Now if your ex hasn’t called or texted you since the breakup, it’s not the end of the world. He may feel awkward about how things ended and he might not know what to say. If you’re looking to get your boyfriend back, there are distinct ways of piquing his interest and getting him to start thinking about you again. Many of these methods and techniques are pretty fast-working, so be ready to know what to do when your ex finally does reach out and call.